Chat-man's News

Well Well Hell

2017-05-12 23:08:39 by Chat-man
Updated

GUESS I OUGHTA UPDATE SOME SHIT, HUH?

Aight, allow me to once again spew the contents of my life onto this digital journal like some halfbrained "Diary of a WImpy Kid" fanboy. My life's been moving fast, especially the social aspect, so it was bothering me to see that same goshDAMN post from last month sit so long.

Most importantly, LOOK I MADE ART AGAINhttp://www.newgrounds.com/art/view/chat-man/super-monkey-baller-julian

Oh, also I'm legally an adult now. I can legally be in the army, smoke, sell alcohol but no consume it, and be charged as a pedophile. Truly a magical age to exist at.

A lot's been going on over the past month, with my birthday, prom, 4 AP classes I survived, losing friends but getting closer with ones I have, and mmmmm that new Gorillaz album tho. Basically I been busy as fuck but now my schedule cleared up, especially with no more APs in my way. Especially AP Art jesus christ I was up until like 5am painting pretty pictures and sculpting out clay peepees for that class. Guess I'm ready 4 college now!!!

With all this free time I plan on getting more digital stuff done, so hopefully y'all will see more from me very soon. And who knows, maybe I'll upgrade this blog from toilet paper for my personal life into something better. Maybe the headquarters for the Jimmy Neutron hentai fanclub?? Anything's better than this.

Anywho, expect to see me back real soon, fellas!! I got plenty more arts in store for your precious lil retinas to beat off to<333


BREAK (my neck)

2017-04-15 21:24:57 by Chat-man

GREETINGS ONCE AGAIN, STALKERS AND STRANGERS ALIKE.

I don't have any sort of vlog ot let's play channel of sorts, so I compensate by doing a loud and obnoxious intro at the beginning of each blog post. Did it get your attention? Did your brain rattle at the idea of how loud that intro would have been if it were real?

My fucking brain's rattling, but that's because I'm unhappy. Allow me to update everyone on a few things.

I MADE NEW ART, LOOK: http://www.newgrounds.com/art/view/chat-man/complications

It's about complex emotions, such as how fucking gay I am for making art about emotions. But in all seriousness, I've had a bit of a rough patch in my social life. Turns out one of the effects senioritis has on some people is morphing them into gigantic bags of dicks. Just so happens a lot of these people were people I was close to. People ain't exactly been the nicest to me. Now you'd think with all this emotional shit, I could probably go for a big bag of dicks right about now, right? WRONG. I need some cuddling, my friends. I need me a nice date out at the bed and breakfast place with the fancy syrup options and oversized waffles. I'm so tired of getting metaphorically ass rammed by people who once cared about me.

At this point I'm just waiting out the rest of the school year because I got nothing left to look forwards to from it. I'm headed to Brooklyn by the end of August to attend a fancy art college, so I got lots of great new people and experiences to look forwards to there. School's dead to me, homies. 

I'm on spring break still, so I've been chilling out and living life. I went on a cruise, which was dope. I went to Haiti and Jamaica. Jamaica especially was one hell of a place, with all the pot brownies for sale and jumping down waterfalls and shit. The cruise ship itself was a party city. I got to finally act my age and meet people who were like me. Sucks I have to wait another several months before I can get to have anything like that again.

I dunno, I really just write these things for myself so I can look back and reflect. Hopefully I'll be in a better spot soon.

Anyways, catch you FUCKS later.

LOVE U BYE<3


BRAND NEW GAME

2017-03-24 17:57:33 by Chat-man
Updated

Howdy howdy

YOU FURRY APES

I just released my very first game right here, GO LOOK!: http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/690727

It's a game I made for an AP programming class using some shitty Code.org website. I had to export it into HTML to get it to work outside of the website which was a bitch but the important thing is, IT WORKS ON MOBILE TOO. So rather than using your portable devices to find material to whack your benjamin franklin to, I suggest a nice quality time with your very own virtual buddy.

I did all the artwork coding, and credited where I took sound loops from. It was tough to make but I like the end result, just wished it loaded a little smoother.

I was really inspired by a lot of those crude flash games where you just kill and/or beat the everloving shit out of a cute cartoon character. I loved playing those when I was just a small boy, a lost 10 year old child on the internet. No club penguin for me, just clubby the seal all day. Only 90s kids will remember!!!

So how about you get yourself a nice glass of wine, put on your most velvet-y robe, sit down by the fire, and brutally murder a cute little smiley face. And maybe leave a comment and a rating or something, I dunno.

THANKS LOVE YOU BYE<3


NEW ART COME LOOK

2017-02-27 17:27:44 by Chat-man

GOOD NEWS, EVERYONE!

Outside of my huge Futurama kick and getting my wisdom teeth painfully slashed my from face, I actually got shit done! I've submitted three new pieces to the art portal, all pieces being some of the best work I've done. You can see them here:

http://www.newgrounds.com/art/view/chat-man/same-drugs-sticker

http://www.newgrounds.com/art/view/chat-man/blue-devil-mural

http://www.newgrounds.com/art/view/chat-man/peter-and-the-starcatcher

I'm especially proud of the Same Drugs one I made for Chance The Rapper. That dude's music is an inspiration, I've been a huge fan since I discovered his album 'Coloring Book' back in December. And with the release of an amazing music video to his song Same Drugs, I just had to make something. Look it up if you haven't already.

And check all that art shit out because it might be another DECADE before I upload again. I been getting better about it though, so who knows?? The viagara a la work ethic seems to be finally kicking my lazy bones into gear. Basically senior year's been helping me to improve my work while simultaneously doing way more of it. It's like a stressful circus act where you juggle projects instead of knives!!

Be sure to stay tuned. BYE.



UGHHHHHGHGHH

The FUCK is up with you all, how the FUCK are you?? I'm pretty good. Good enough to give an enthusiastic DMX-inspired intro. For the record, I am alive. Busier than a child actor on 90s Nick, but alive. For how much longer? I dunno. I got heart problems man, can't sleep that shit off. 

So what have I been up to that has prevented me from uploading any art online when I claim to be so busy? School and COMMISIONED art. "Wowee," you declare outloud after reading that word, "Why the heck did he put so much emphasis on it?"  I'm sure you're very impressed by this big boy word I just threw out there for you to rub your dick to. The work I've been doing lately is not the fun, carefree art that I normally like to do. Instead it is artwork that is parts of multiple projects that are all school-related. I've got the wonderful yearbook project that is coming to close real soon, as well as a poster for a drama club local play that I've been hired to do the artwork for. I've also got my AP Art class on top of that, so let's just say I haven't really been able to put my attention anywhere near surreal interpretations of the Simpsons as I would normally be doing.

So, yeah, busy. It's pretty cool to get my name out there though. Once all these projects come to a close, you can count on plenty more of my usual crap-on-canvas to wipe up with your eyes.


L I T

2017-01-12 22:26:36 by Chat-man
Updated

I'm on my fifth tube of GoGurt, it's been a rough week everyone.

I've been contemplating life questions. Such as my future, my social and emotional state, and where Oscar the Grouch goes to the bathroom.

Hate being a Debbie Downy with an extra frowny-face chromosome, but hey, I'm feeling much better. Just hit a bit of a bump, but fortunately I'm one of those rubber babies that just bounces back into life's arms after being dropped. Drawing things I like really helps me feel better, so look forwards to more art!! I just finished a piece and will be starting another shortly. Feel free to review if you wanna<3

See ya bums later B^)

 


2K17

2017-01-02 00:21:27 by Chat-man

Jesus Christ. It's 2017.

It's both a insane and really underwhelming thought. I mean, on one hand it's the year that a highschool senior like me has had to wear on my soul like a nazi armband for the past decade. To think that the year is finally here, well, it's a bit crazy to say the least. However, just because it's 2017 doesn't mean shit suddenly changed. Sure the number changed, but it's kind of hard to comprehend that a year symbolic of so much change has arrived when even my seat hasn't changed in the past 24 hours. And I'm pretty sure that corn chip stuck in my ass crack was from New Year's 2015.

All jokes aside, my life has changed a lot. Not because of 2017, but because of the point in life I have reached. I've never been so grounded in reality with so much to show for it. First off, my number one choice college has accepted me into their program and even threw a solid $13000 annual scholarship in my direction. Like, damn, that's one hell of a bone they throw me. That's some Flintstones shit right there. So, needless to say, I know where I'm going in life. And this is the most passionate and confident I've ever been in my artwork. For once in my life, I feel like the shit I make is something I can show the world without a horrible regret. 2016 was a fantastic year of artistic improvement, and I can't wait to see where 2017 takes those skills.

My social life is also pretty great. Sure, a lot of my friends have become distant and wrapped up in their own lives and some even decided to drop me like their drunken uncle dropped them as an infant. To them I say, whatever, fuck you, just don't come crying to me about "boohoo we should've hung out more because now we'll probably never see each other ever again." I'd be really lucky not see some of them ever again. But that's besides the point. The friends I have are ones I really appreciate. Nice people who I can count on for a laugh. Even better is the relationship I'm currently in. She's the best girl I could've asked for, and her company outdoes just about everyone else's. Because woah. She's lady jesus.

So, yeah, sorry for my latenight ramblings. I write these wall-shits purely for my own self entertainment. Because I know some time in the future, I'll be able to look back on this digital cringefest of diary and remember the good ol' days before I lived in a box.

I hope y'all had a great Christmas and an even better New Year.

SEE YOU FUCKS SOON! KISSES!!


Christmas INCOMING

2016-12-08 18:05:47 by Chat-man

If Santa Claus sees everything that means he sees you pee in the shower teehee. Hope you like coal for Christmas.

'TIS THE SEASON. So as we all know, Christmas is on it's way and everybody's getting gifts for each other in the spirit of not looking like an asshole!! Christmas is actually my favorite season though. It's the one time of year that perfectly pieces together the things in life I love. Good people, good food, good times, and maybe some cool new stuff. I could work at Hallmark with that attitude. I've decided to let the good spirit get to me and I'm going to be gifting artwork and stuff I've made and will have printed onto things like posters, phone cases, and clothing. It's gonna be one hefty task. Guess I'm a masochist when it comes to pens and paints. I've already got a lot of deadlines coming up. I'm running short on time and money but who knows- Maybe a wet kiss on the mouth from Santa man himself will give me enough Christmas magic to survive. In the mean time, it's up the the magic of holiday anxiety to give me the strength to succeed.

I'll be back soon. Keep my sleigh-seat warm, fellas!


Monkey w/ Cymbals

2016-11-20 15:11:31 by Chat-man

Hola Hola.

Allow me to update you  F U C K S  on what's been happening in my life. First off, lot's of art. I mean I can't even take a shit without wiping my ass with some fucking picasso piece of wonder. Of course, I'm not saying I'm anywhere close to picasso right now. In fact, I'm probably closer to that left ear of his he cut off. Nevertheless, I been in full creative drive and I have yet to crash into that homeless person jaywalking we all call "art block." So keep your eyes peeled for some more of my content!! I been doing a lot with my school's mascot lately on account of being the only senior in my school who does digital cartoons. Plus I'm in yearbook so it's cool that I'll be able to get those drawings of the blue devil into the book for all to see! Except the cover won't be revealed to all the peeps in my school 'til June, so it'll probably look like garbage to me by then haha. But check out my recent pieces herehere, and HERE. The Homer Simpson one is just a quickie but I might do more like that since it was fun.

Other than that, it's just school, girlfriend, and lame-o politics. Thank god for the girlfriend part because fuck school and fuck politics. I'm not even gonna get too into detail about politics, I just kinda hate both sides right now (but mostly the left lmao). But hey, these conditions in society have made a pretty awesome season in South Park I recommend everybody watches. Plus JonTron becoming a political figure is my favorite. Bless his little heart.

I hope to see you all soon once more. Give papa a big ol' kiss on the mouth!!


WHAT'S UP CHAT NATION

2016-10-02 18:02:13 by Chat-man
Updated

Okay alright okay you guys fucking amped?? I'm fucking AMPED. The butterflies in my stomach are having an orgy right now you don't even fucking know.

For real though, here's what's up: I'm a SENIOR. Finally, the perfect excuse for bullying and public indecency. You say it's wrong my dick's out? I say my dick's a senior, so you can give it a discount on its coffee you freshman friday fag bag. I run this school now.

Senior year is pretty exciting to me to say the least. I've been participating a fuck ton, helping make a 5k and designing t-shirts for my school, not to mention being a yearbook editor who also gets to make the DAMN COVER. All I gotta do is put a sweet hentai babe on the front and I get a 5 out of 5 on Newgrounds. But you guys'll have to settle on a lame blue devil thing and some nature shit since the theme has to do with nature this year. Maybe I'll give the tree tits, lmao.

I've been a busy bee to say the least, but when you get a taste of this honey you're gonna pitch a tent from how dang good it is. Hopefully. A lot of it is promotional text designs and stuff for t-shirts so I can't and don't want to upload it. However, I've got like 15 new project ideas I'm working on for fun and I'll put those here!!! Also, I did a promotional thing for my AP Gov class I'm ashamed of (below).

2783307_147544568512_Election2016NG.png

Hope to be back soon!!!! Love U!!!